The Olympics event I could not watch

So, the Olympics is over, although the pundits will probably continue arguing over whether it was the best, the worst, or (likely) somewhere in between.

Finished or not, my wife wanted to watch some of the equestrian events, not having seen any during the live presentations - I guess horseriding is not a sexy or mainstream enough sport for prime-time viewing, which I can quite understand. I, gamely, complied, despite not really liking horseriding, or horses for that matter (not since one bit me in North Wales as a small boy, and definitely not since an extended hack in the wilds of Colombia left me with compacted vertebrae that too many months, and a good deal if pain, to fix).

But I digress. The event in question was the cross-country part of the equestrian program (or "eventing" as it is now inexplicably called). Give me credit: I started to watch it. But, less than a minute into the first competitor's run, the horse and rider were faced with a gate leading straight into a steep bank and a water hazard. The horse stumbled on the bank, which was almost impossible to miss as far as I could see, and threw its rider into the drink, before following him in.

Apparently, all concerned were OK, but it just seemed to me a recipe for horse-crippling, and I couldn't watch any more. I went upstairs and did the ironing, it was that bad. I understand from my wife that most other competitors were able to cope with that particular jump, but I definitely wasn't going to watch just in case it was responsible for a lame horse. And I don't even like horses.

Just as an aside, I don't really understand why horseriding is even an Olympic sport. It does not seem to require the same kind of athleticism as other sports, even some of the more questionable ones like skateboarding and surfing. It is the only "sport" in which men and women compete equally, as far as I know, but that is really not a compelling argument for keeping it (and probably just underscores the fact that it does not require athleticism, as athleticism is commonly understood).

The modern pentathlon Olympic event also includes horseriding, and that too seems like a rather ridiculous event. Apparently, the competitors do not even get to use their own horses, but are allocated an unknown horse at random, some of which (perhaps understandably) don't really want to jump over barriers and gates for no apparent reason. And this is a test of the competitors' athleticism how?

So, I say: get rid of the horses, and bring in some serious sports like darts and tiddlywinks. Or at the very least squash and stand-up paddleboarding. Or even breakdancing - oh, wait, breakdancing WILL be an Olympic sport in 2024! What? Maybe keep the horses...